| On rare occasions, when a well-meaning | | | | discovered that many pastors have none. Face |
| Christian discovers that I prefer home | | | | it, who can they open up to where they might |
| churches to traditional denominational | | | | not become an item of betraying gossip, |
| gatherings and am not affiliated with any | | | | perceived as weak, or jeopardize their own |
| particular group - although I'm asked to | | | | job? In my own life, I find myself repeatedly |
| minister in many - it has happened that their | | | | serving as a sounding board and prayer |
| discovery is met with a negative response, | | | | partner for those in ministry - even online. |
| assuming I must have been hurt and require a | | | | Just who can these men and women talk to for |
| ministerial tourniquet.Truth is, just as it | | | | seeking wise counsel?BREAKING OUT IS HARD TO |
| is with so many others, yes, I was hurt. But | | | | DOLeaving ministry is hard to do, and those |
| Jesus, my Redeemer and Healer, ministered to | | | | who have stepped down from the pastoral role |
| me, bound up my wounds and turned me loose on | | | | admit "there are at least parts of ministry" |
| the enemy. The Father has used certain | | | | that they miss. According to the study: |
| negative, manmade circumstances over the | | | | "Their accounts were remarkably consistent: |
| years to get me to recognize that what I was | | | | they most missed leading worship and being a |
| calling "The Church" had no semblance to | | | | meaningful part of people's lives." Those who |
| anything described within the pages of | | | | were forced to leave the ministry for another |
| Scripture, nor does it bare any resemblance | | | | vocation under circumstances not of their own |
| to the Church in the third world, the | | | | choosing, or who felt that they had in some |
| persecuted corners of the Earth - the ONLY | | | | way been mistreated, mourned the job loss |
| places on the planet where Christianity is | | | | most intensely. The researchers mentioned |
| actually thriving, by the way. In his | | | | that several of their interviews were |
| multi-faceted, multi-purposeful, loving way, | | | | interrupted when ministers broke down in |
| God also used the situations in which I had | | | | tears. Former pastors who were content with |
| been placed to help me realize a few things | | | | their new vocational setting also told of |
| about myself. Perhaps, as you read this | | | | their love for local church ministry.One |
| message, you may realize a few of those | | | | issue that concerns me is the authors' |
| things about yourself as well.I was once the | | | | assumption that friendship among pastors, |
| Singles Pastor of a church with nearly 3,000 | | | | though important, is inherently limited |
| people on the role. One outdoor event we held | | | | because "ministers feel unavoidable |
| had hundreds of singles attend. I baptized 16 | | | | competition with each other, which gets in |
| in a river that cool October day. I left that | | | | the way of forming healthy support groups." |
| church after 5 years with a much-beloved | | | | In my own hometown, where I serve as the |
| couple who felt led to start a House Church. | | | | Marketing guru for the local Chamber of |
| We grew so fast we felt compelled to find a | | | | Commerce, many of the 80+ ministries in town |
| building and establish "Church as usual," in | | | | have joined our ranks. It's wonderful to see |
| accordance with the prescribed methods we had | | | | these men and women serving alongside in |
| all been taught. We grew to 300 in no time. | | | | their matching "Ambassador" blazers or |
| It lasted eight years. I served there as the | | | | serving on committees together or chatting |
| Assistant Pastor and left after seven years | | | | and laughing at a mixer.Another opportunity |
| when I was asked to step down from serving in | | | | in which many churches participate is |
| the thriving Children's ministry. I won't | | | | something we call "Operation: Jesus." So far, |
| elaborate, but it was political. I had thirty | | | | pastors and people from numerous churches |
| volunteers serving with me and the kids were | | | | have co-mingled and gone out in teams to |
| being trained to minister and were active in | | | | canvas the county and pray at people's |
| all capacities of Church-Life from ushers to | | | | doorsteps. To date, after three "missions," |
| musicians. They LOVED outreaches in the | | | | we've knocked on 30,000 doors. In my last |
| poorest of neighborhoods, manning the puppet | | | | outing, my team consisted of a Baptist |
| shows, passing out groceries and praying | | | | preacher of a church of 300, a Disciples of |
| door-to-door. Finally, I moved two hours | | | | Christ youth minister, a Baptist nurse, two |
| south to be nearer to my family. Within a | | | | House Churchers, and an Assemblies of God |
| year after I left, the church closed its | | | | woman. I recall speaking with the secretary |
| doors. There were less than twenty attending | | | | of the Lutheran church who reported that she |
| by then, I was told. My ministry, health, | | | | had the most memorable time, along with her |
| family and personal life have flourished ever | | | | daughter, knocking and praying alongside the |
| since.These days, I am an avid House Churcher | | | | pastor's wife from the Assemblies of God and |
| who, through relationships and the leading of | | | | her daughter. It's quite disarming when |
| the Holy Spirit, find myself being invited to | | | | individuals from different churches knock on |
| speak to Christians of many denominations in | | | | a door to pray. Why? Obviously, they aren't |
| a variety of settings. In our House Church, | | | | recruiting.I believe such relationships may |
| we have seen miracles, deliverances, and | | | | be the key to sustaining pastors over time |
| lives changed regularly. Something I | | | | and not simply during crises. The study says: |
| attribute to one thing: we love each other. | | | | "...it is the kind of collegiality that is |
| There is unity there and it commands a | | | | crucial to the cultivation of self-knowledge, |
| blessing from on high.THE SMITING OF THE | | | | relational intelligence, the capacity to |
| SHEPHERDWhy do pastors leave the ministry? A | | | | remain dynamically engaged with one's work |
| research paper by Dean Hoge and Jacqueline | | | | and the ability to identify and negotiate |
| Wenger reveal several main reasons:(1) | | | | conflict, all of which are relevant to |
| preference for another form of ministry | | | | preventing the dynamics that cause clergy to |
| | | | leave pastoral ministry." Such interaction |
| (2) the need to care for children or family | | | | produces unity and with unity comes |
| | | | power.Where there is disunity, we are |
| (3) conflict in the congregation | | | | essentially snake food.Hoge also authored a |
| | | | book on the Roman Catholic clergy, The First |
| (4) conflict with denominational leaders | | | | Five Years of the Priesthood, in which he |
| | | | writes that one of the most important |
| (5) burnout or discouragement | | | | findings of his research was that priests |
| | | | left the ministry because they "felt lonely |
| (6) sexual misconduct | | | | and unappreciated." Loneliness was the one |
| | | | factor always present among the various |
| (7) and divorce or marital problems.Two of | | | | reasons priests resigned in their early years |
| these factors are especially important: | | | | of ministry. Hoge claims that when loneliness |
| conflict and a preference for specialized | | | | "is absent, resignation from the priesthood |
| ministry. A close third is the experience of | | | | is unlikely. Whether a priest is heterosexual |
| burnout, discouragement, stress and | | | | or homosexual, in love or not, it will not |
| overwork.Their study is part of the larger | | | | drive him to resign unless at the same time |
| Pulpit and Pew research project on the state | | | | he feels lonely or unappreciated."This same |
| of pastoral ministry, based at Duke Divinity | | | | dynamic appears to be present among |
| School, funded by the Lilly Endowment. The | | | | Protestant clergy.A PASTOR'S TESTIMONYAn |
| authors conducted extensive interviews with | | | | article by Bill Hull, Leadership Journal, |
| clergymen and women who have left Protestant | | | | Summer 2005, echoes similar sentiments. Hull |
| church ministry, voluntarily or | | | | pastored 20 years and is the founder of T-Net |
| involuntarily, and with denominational | | | | International, a ministry devoted to |
| leaders from five denominations including the | | | | transforming churches into disciple-making |
| Assemblies of God, the Evangelical Lutheran | | | | communities. He's an author who, as a |
| Church in America, the Lutheran | | | | minister, had become frustrated by his |
| Church-Missouri Synod, the Presbyterian | | | | perceived ineffectiveness as it pertained to |
| Church (U.S.A.) and the United Methodist | | | | the Great Commission in light of the Doctrine |
| Church. Another heart-wrenching book that I | | | | of Jesus. Something HAD to change.He |
| read years ago, Shattered Vows, is an expose' | | | | discovered that "something" was himself.He |
| on Catholic priests and why they leave their | | | | writes, "We had just commissioned 83 new |
| callings. The reasons are similar to their | | | | members. It was a proud moment. The newly |
| Protestant counterparts, as I recall.Hoge and | | | | initiated throng made their way off the |
| Wenger learned that, in many denominations, a | | | | platform, while I moved closer to the |
| standard of dependence between clergy and | | | | congregation to begin my sermon."This is |
| leadership is set that is hard to live up to. | | | | great, isn't it?" I began. "But before we get |
| Also, things such as greater freedom of | | | | too giddy about new members, let me ask you a |
| choice and the tendency of a minister's | | | | question. Why should we bring 83 new people |
| spouse to choose to work outside the home | | | | into something that isn't working?" He |
| have made the desired pastoral model | | | | continued, too far along to turn back now, |
| increasingly hard to find. The study reveals: | | | | "Something is wrong," he said. "It has been |
| "the more a pastor's career is determined by | | | | tormenting me for several years. All the |
| his or her denomination, the more conflict | | | | formulas, strategic planning, mission |
| that pastor will potentially feel with | | | | statements and visionary sermons are not |
| denominational leaders."Conflict with church | | | | making disciples."Bill was being tormented by |
| leadership looms large. The #1 conflict | | | | these truths. Where was the personal |
| issues cited by pastors who left ministry | | | | transformation after all the effort we put |
| were:(1) pastoral leadership style | | | | into weekend services, Bible studies, small |
| | | | groups, and outreach events? His |
| (2) church finances | | | | 52-life-changing sermons weren't bearing any |
| | | | fruit. He was stuck in the same rut that so |
| (3) changes in worship style | | | | many pastors find themselves in, i.e., |
| | | | religious activity without real |
| (4) staff relationships and | | | | transformation. He was what you'd call |
| | | | Successful and Unsatisfied.He writes, "At age |
| (5) building projects.Organizational and | | | | 50 I found myself successful but unsatisfied. |
| interpersonal issues, rather than doctrinal | | | | I was hooked on results, addicted to |
| differences or hot-button issues such as | | | | recognition, and a product of my times. I was |
| homosexuality, were the most likely to | | | | a get-it-done leader who was ready to lead |
| motivate ministers to leave a congregation. | | | | people into the rarified air of religious |
| The study states: "Most notable about the | | | | competition. Like so many pastors, I was |
| main conflicts experienced by ministers who | | | | addicted to what others thought of me."Nobody |
| left parish ministry is their 'everyday,' | | | | can share Bill's testimony the way Bill can. |
| prosaic nature." Hoge and Wenger "came to | | | | Read on:"As I stood before the people that |
| believe that the conflicts most often | | | | morning, I was prepared to pour out my soul, |
| experienced by our participants are ones that | | | | even my desperation. I was nearing the end of |
| could probably be resolved and in the process | | | | a three-year reshaping of my person, and I |
| offer growth experiences for both pastor and | | | | had morphed in such a way that I could never |
| congregation."Sadly, isolation and loneliness | | | | go back. Bill Hull, the Disciple Making |
| contributed directly or indirectly to a | | | | Pastor (at least the guy who'd written a book |
| pastor's decision to ship out. Of those who | | | | by that title), had been broken by God."For |
| left due to sexual misconduct, 75 percent | | | | three years people had been steadily leaving |
| indicated that they were lonely and isolated. | | | | our church. It was the most painful |
| In all five denominational groups, the top | | | | experience of my pastoral life, and so many |
| motivating factors for leaving were the same. | | | | times I wanted to run away. But God spoke to |
| Pastors reported:"I felt drained by demands." | | | | me powerfully one morning as I lay prostrate |
| | | | on my office floor. "Bill, I am going to |
| "I felt lonely and isolated." | | | | break you; don't run." I wanted to run, I |
| | | | prayed about running, I asked others about |
| "I did not feel supported by denominational | | | | finding a better fit (a.k.a. running), but I |
| officials." | | | | couldn't bring myself to do it."Most of the |
| | | | people who left the church hadn't left |
| "I felt bored and constrained."Hoge and | | | | because of conviction but because of feelings |
| Wenger discovered one glaring similarity | | | | or the opinions of friends. Believe it or |
| regarding pastors who have left local church | | | | not, people don't usually do a lot of |
| ministry: "These pastors ..., for whatever | | | | research, and then act in accordance with |
| reason [were] not part of ministerial | | | | biblical truth, when choosing to leave a |
| friendship groups or action groups."Where | | | | church. |
| intimate relationships are concerned, I've | | | | |